No idiot is perfect!

[Guest DaveW]

Received in an email:-

 

They Walk Among Us - BE VERY WARY

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No.1
My daughter and I went to the McDonald's drive through check-out window to pay our bill and I gave the clerk a £5 note Our total bill was £4.20, so I also handed her a 20 pence piece and a £5 note. She said, 'You gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back. 'She sighed and went to get the Manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but we do not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change. Do not confuse the clerks at MacDonald's, or their Managers come to that !!

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No2
We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower. 'I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two..' We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park , near Watford .

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No3
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the Highways Department to request the removal of the 'DEER CROSSING' sign from our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of road! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing, anymore. 'Story from Potters Bar, Hertfordshire.

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No 4
My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a Taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had Iceberg Lettuce. From South Oxhey , Hertfordshire.

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No 5
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'  To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'  He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.' Happened at Luton Airport UK

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No 6
The traffic light on the corner buzzes when the lights turn red and it is safe to cross the road. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged friend of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.  Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!' She is a Local County Council employee in Harrow, Middlesex. UK (And she's NOT blonde)

 

IDIOT SIGHTING No7
When my husband and I arrived at our local Ford dealer to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the Service Department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the Driver's door.  As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door-handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'it’s open!' His reply: 'I know. I already did that side. 'This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans , Hertfordshire UK

 

STAY ALERT! They walk among us. AND THEY BREED!

Edited February 10, 2013 by DaveW

[fuzzyedges]

A friend of mine's wife once asked "what do they called that nut on the top of a walnut whip?" 

 

Idiot sighting No1 above  Have you ever done this in reverse to a bored airhead , When the bill comes to say £ 2.53 say just a minute I have 46pence here and then stand back and watch their brain explode

[Guest Lee]

A woman came into the Milton Keynes Shopping Centre back in the late 80's. Don't know how she got in as we'd evacuated the entire centre and the only ones left inside were us (Security), Police and Fire Officers. I stopped her and told her to leave (we'd had an IRA coded bomb warning past to us) whereupon she holds up a Boots bag and the conversation went like this:

 

Me: You've got to leave, we've evacuated the building.
Her: I've got to go to Boots to return this.
Me: (pointing at Boots which we were opposite) It's shut, the doors are locked....we've evacuated so you've got to go.
Her: I'll only be a minute...I'm on my lunch break.
Me: I don't care, there's nobody in there...we've evacuated...please...leave now.
Her: But I need to return this (holding up the bag as if it made a difference).
Me: Please, leave now.
Her: But I've.....
Police Officer with loudspeaker to his mouth: GET THE F*** OUT OF HERE.....NOW!!

She virtually ran out the centre....wonder if she ever did get her item changed.

[Heather]

i despair of some people, i really do ! :wallbash: